Today marks the 9th week of my pregnancy. That's right, folks! Krista's got a baby in her belly! I've wanted to get on here sooner and write something about it, but for a few reasons I've not. The last few weeks I've felt pretty miserable, coupled with the anxiety of another miscarriage AND keeping myself otherwise occupied, I've just not been around. But last week I started feeling like myself again, and this week marks a new era. The baby is now an inch long!
So here's the story: In December, Victor and I traveled to Japan for some work. It was an amazing trip. I suppose being halfway around the world can affect the way our bodies work, because Aunt flow was pretty weird. Four days early ON birth control! That never happens. But it did, and when we got home, I was ready for everything to settle back to normal. Ahh... but it wouldn't. Somehow over the course of the trip, my next month of pills got lost... leaving me susceptible to... well... babies. But I was always convinced I'd have a hard time getting pregnant since my mom had endometriosis and I was SO much like her. Not true! By the beginning of January I knew I was pregnant. And so I was. Two weeks went by with light cramping and spotting, and on Saturday Jan. 24, I lost the baby. Talk about weird. I say "weird" rather than awful or other words because at the time, that's all it was - weird. My body hadn't even really started changing yet, but still, I lost a baby. Victor and I spent the weekend at home, in bed, crying and holding each other, and by Monday, we both felt really well. The doctor told me to wait until my next normal period to begin taking birth control again, so we waited. About 4 weeks later, there it was in all it's miserable glory. :) So I went to WalMart, got my Rx filled, and the next day... "Oh, sorry. We don't seem to have a record of you filling it." ??? Seriously? You can't mess around with these things. If you are supposed to be on the pill on Sunday, you don't wait till Tuesday to take it. You take it Sunday. Okay, okay. I can be ONE day behind schedule. "Ma'am, actually you don't have anymore refills. You'll have to schedule an appointment with your doctor." AGH!!! No way. NO way. So I called my doctor, and although you are NOT supposed to get Rx's over the phone, she completely understood my situation and told me she'd call WalMart and have them fill it. Well, either she forgot or they did, but come Monday there was no gift for me at the Pharmacy. Can you believe it? So home I went, empty handed and again, susceptible to babies...
I suppose the rest is history since I'm clearly pregnant, but wow. I'll tell ya. Victor and I have discovered that we are in desperate need of birth control! I am one fertile myrtle! These past few months have been an emotional roller coaster. The week before I found out I was pregnant again, I got very angry for having lost my baby. I mean, livid. I was jealous of everyone else who was getting pregnant, mad that my own baby was gone, and so upset that I'd soon be back on b.c. pills for who knows how long before we decided we were ready. I cried, yelled, and felt overall miserable. Little, SO little, did I know that already a new baby was growing inside me. :) I couldn't have imagined it possible.
So here we are now. Victor has been a pillar of strength for me through all of this, and has repeatedly expressed his joy over this little one. I know I'm not out of the woods yet, but nothing is like it was last time. No cramping, no spotting, and no gloomy feelings. That's something else. With the last pregnancy, even before there was trouble, I would tell Victor that something didn't seem right. I couldn't put a finger on it, but something was off. And every night, starting a few days before I found out I was pregnant, I would dream about the baby. Well, the night before I lost the baby the dreams stopped. I remember waking up that morning and telling Victor, "Huh. That's weird, I didn't dream about the baby last night." It's so sad to recall, but I am so thankful that it happened as early as it did. I am also so thankful to find myself pregnant yet again, and so soon!
About this baby - I have been so amazingly bloated. Already my jeans don't button and I feel like a fat cow! LOL! But I'm okay with that. And my boobs! Yowzas! I never knew they could hurt so bad! :) I'm eager for next week to get here, since that's usually when the uterus pops up high enough to start feeling it. Eee!
Victor and I have decided on Juliet Quinn if it's a girl, and if it's a boy, heaven help us. We have no idea. :) We kind of like Avery right now, but it's certainly not set in stone.
I guess that's all for now. No pictures yet, and I still haven't had my first appointment (which is driving me a little crazy. I'm SO ready!)
More to come soon!